he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
