Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
