wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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