thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
