D3 body, D1 cock
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
