using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
