i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
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