I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize