wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
