Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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