great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
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