Buhtt sex?
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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