Screwed.edu
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
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