you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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