It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
