dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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