I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
