I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
