Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
