What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
