Bisexual people are plain selfish.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
