can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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