No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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