She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
