Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
