i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
