I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
you would pick up someone in the library
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize