then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Princesses don't give blow jobs
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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