how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
