you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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