How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
