cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
