So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Randomize
