Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Randomize
