I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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