I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Randomize
