Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Oh god it's open bar.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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