seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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