hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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