I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
