i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize