I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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