Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
