the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
