Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Dignity is for republicans.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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