we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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