His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
