we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
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