I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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