She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
