but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
